


Illusions

by camshaft22



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: M/M, N/A - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-02-23
Updated: 2011-04-22
Packaged: 2017-10-18 12:08:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 18,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/188739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/camshaft22/pseuds/camshaft22
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What do you do when faced with the truth within an illusion?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

_**Illusion (Stargateland Big Bang) Part One**_  
Title: Illusions  
Author: camshaft22 and falconsheart  
Characters: Cam Mitchell/ John Sheppard, Evan Lorne, Teal'c  
Fandom: Stargate SG-1  
Warnings: Males having sex, portrayal of insanity, unbeta'd. All mistakes are mine.  
Legal: Not mine, belongs to MGM and other companies. Wish they were mine. Atlantis would still be on.  
  
Cam Mitchell grinned at John Sheppard as they walked out in the clearing on the other side of the wormhole. “Aren’t you glad I needed you for this very important mission? I mean that’s got to be better than the latest IOA meeting, right?” he asked, teasing him as SG 3 fanned out behind them.

John Sheppard did his best to not shoot the leader of Sg1 a glare. With Atlantis landing on Earth the expedition had come to an end and the IOA had begun to reassign expedition members. “Lets find that Ancient device you located and see what it really does.”  He replied, his eyes scanning their surroundings. The planet definitely looked like one of those worlds the Ancients had seeded, plant-life, geo-formation and climate resembling Earth.

“Hey. I’m on your side here. Besides, they promised it would only be temporary. I’ll see what I can do to help, alright?” Cam told him, knowing what he was glaring about. “Good idea. This way,” he said, sorta wishing Teal’c, Daniel and Vala were back from that conference. But they’d been here before, it was a totally safe world. Cam took off, leading them forward as they went to the ruins. They stopped at a dark stone obelisk and Cam glanced over to John. “Can you feel anything?”

Temporary probably meant that the IOA had the patience to wait until they could use the end of their twenty years to retire some of them, John was keenly aware that his own date for that was not far away any more. He shrugged it off, part of him knew that he’d never return to Pegasus, it was the price they ultimately payed for the close contact the expedition had enjoyed with Earth. His eyes turned to the Obelisk, a black spire of polished stone, impeccable and softly shimmering under the sunlight. He could sense it, hear a soft whisper emerging from the dark stone. “Definitely Ancient,” he replied to Mitchell’s question. “it is... whispering.” He stepped closer, his hands tracing over the black surface.

“What is it?” Cam asked, stepping closer to him. “Can you tell?” he questioned, glancing at him.

John did not look up, much as he could feel the glance of the other Colonel on himself. “It is kind of a gateway... or keystone. Yes, that’s the word that’s ingrained on it, keystone.” He said, feeling a surge rise from the inside of the stone, a bright light enveloped them, drawing them into the stone and away.

***

  
Cam gasped awake, his hair sticking up, feeling a tightness around his chest. “I... What the hell?” he asked, looking around the dark room and then down, his eyes widening in shock. “A straitjacket?” Cam said, horrified, trying to get loose. “Oh shit. Shit!” he said, rolling and trying to get himself upright. What the hell was this crap?!

The Doctor had been informed the moment the patient woke, she and two nurses hurried to his room. The nurses mainly helped the man to sit up, making sure he did not overly struggle while he was giving the next dose of the medication. Dr. Sycorah squatted down opposite of the man in the straight jacket. “I am so sorry, Colonel,” she said with a gentle smile. “I know that now, that you begin to calm down, all this must be horrifying to you.”

“Where am I?” Cam asked, glancing back and forth at the nurses as they sat him up, then gave him an injection of some sort in a futuristic device. “What did you just give me? What in the hell is going on?” he asked, his blue eyes piercing the Doctor.

“You are in Tamarrigan Medical Center, you were brought here by the security forces after you suffered a severe nervous breakdown.” Dr. Sycorah usually did not tell her patients so directly, but with military people the direct approach was often the best. “The medication we are giving you, are to help you calm down and keep the delusions you were suffering from at bay.”

“I don’t even know where that is... and what delusions? I don’t even know how I got here, wherever here is. Where’s John? We were doing... something...”

“Calm,” Dr. Sycorah could see that he was still very agitated. “John is fine, you attacked him shortly during the ceremony, but none of the injuries was severe. He is very worried about you, especially as I think he feels a bit responsible...” She stopped, gesturing the nurses they could wait outside now. “You were having delusions, believing yourself to be someone else... I guess your mind took refuge in some of your favourite novels, when the strain became too great.”

“I don’t understand... I don’t remember any of this... What happened? What did I do? Why am I trussed up like this?”

“The memory will return, the medication will help you to unblock the pathways to your long-term memory.” Dr. Sycorah replied. “you were at the leaving ceremony for your friend John Sheppard. He was awarded the Star of Valor in thanks of his lifelong service. You had worked very hard those last years, and your aide-de-camp said that you hadn’t slept properly in weeks. When the ceremony was nearly over you had a breakdown, believing yourself to be trapped here, to be some character from the Gate-Novels. You attacked John Sheppard.”

“I attacked...  I’m sorry... I wouldn’t do that. Not on purpose... and Gate-Novels? What novels? Look... I know I got off the reservation somehow... but is there a way for me to please get out of this jacket? I’m having trouble focusing... and understanding.”

Dr. Sycorah studied her patient, he was much calmer, less agitated and not screaming murder any more. Willing to understand that he had suffered mental impairment due to overwork. She waved in the nurses. “Have the corridor under lockdown,” she told one of them. It would block this unit with shields, so even if he escaped the cell, he’d not get far. She then had the other nurse help releasing him from the straight-jacket. “The Gate-Novels,” she said, while this was happening. “by Shaun Mahanay. You enjoyed reading them, that was confirmed by your friends. They are set on a fictional other planet, Earth. In a less advanced time too... a kind of galactic fantasy, about discovery, adventure and friendship.”

Cam calmly let them take it off, stretching his sore limbs as they released him slowly. “So I went insane because of overwork? What do I do? Because seriously, I should probably look at a new profession,” he said, looking at the doctor, knowing they were watching. “It... Those are novels? Earth isn’t real?”

It was the moment in between remembering reality and recognising illussion, Dr. Sycorah was familiar with that state, it gave her hope. “Earth is not real,” she repeated gently. “it is a very popular story, not more. You are Colonel Cameron Mitchell, of Arion Space Defence, the last ten years you were assigned to the Ydorian Guard, an Elite Force. You there served with John Sheppard for a good while.” Dr. Sycorah could not quite help pointing out that last part again. Sheppard was considered a hero by many.

Cam nodded. “I guess that’s a testament to the writer then... Seems real,” Cam confided. “So John Sheppard is pretty hot shit. He’s pretty great. I feel like I should be apologizing profusely...”

“He is rather worried about you,” Dr. Sycorah said, maybe it would be good for this patient’s mental well-being to let him know that others worried about his crazed state. “judging by the fact that he called me twice to hear how you were doing.” She looked at his eyes, knowing that the medication should be kicking in by now. “What do you remember?”

“It’s starting to come back a little...”  Cam said then scoffed. “Oh yeah, definitely coming back. Shit. What a jerkass I was... I had been working. A lot. Our troop is reorganizing and John was getting his second Star of Valor... and I wanted to get things done... so he didn’t end up doing it by himself...”

“You put yourself through too much,” Dr. Sycorah said gently. “you worked too much and you were still suffering the strain from the last battles. Your mind simply shut down.” She reached for his shoulder, squeezing it gently. “We will help you, I promise.”

“Maybe I should lay off the reading material from now on. Thank you, Doctor. I am mortified that I lost control...”

“You were trying to do too much,” Dr. Sycorah knew that self-recrimination often happened once a patient became aware of the psychosis he had suffered. “we’ll help you to heal.”

Cam nodded. “I’m in your hands, Doctor.”

***

The machine was analyzing the error that had been made, the system was trying to integrate the new input, but the results were inconclusive. The machine was going into a new reset cycle to address the error to correct the faulty mind of source Nr. 1 but the process was interrupted.

The woman standing beside the tanks, surrounded by the long crystal tubes flaring with energy shook her head. This was going nowhere. Seven resets withing only a few hours, this one was struggling hard. She could not allow it to happen, he was one of the greatest sources they had ever found. He and his friend...

Her eyes went to the second tank where the darkhaired man was sleeping. He had succumbed fairly quick, but his mind tended to access parts of the system where he was not supposed to be. His ability to adapt to the machine was surprising and disturbing, he should not have any experience with doing that. Tucking back a streak of hair that had fallen into her eyes, she called for several robots to move the tanks and to set up a large tank. Putting them together might be the solution, their minds reached for each other while they were inside the machine, so maybe putting them together physically would help.

***

John Sheppard stopped the speeder in front of the clinic and parked it in an empty spot. It had been seven weeks since his release from the military and Cameron’s collapse at the ceremony. Contrary to others John was not exasperated about the events but more worried about Cam. The Doctors had been very serious about the whole thing, and especially Doctor Sycorah had been very stern, making it very clear that John’s person created stress for Cam, that he was worrying much because of John and that the demands of serving with John had driven Cam into a loop of overwork. She had not allowed much in terms of visits, and always been at hand in case John caused a problem. It had told him how bad the collapse had been. In the situation of not being able to do much for Cam, John had turned to get a grip on his now civilian life. Cam had been honourable discharged for medical reasons, and now he was here to pick him up. He walked up to the spacious waiting area of the hospital, where Cam probably was waiting.

Cam held the pills, glancing up at the Doctor. “I’ll be sure to comm you if I start feeling like I’m slipping and don’t worry. I won’t cause the hero any problems,” he said, with a smirk.

Dr. Sycorah gently squeezed Cam’s hand. “I will be there whenever you need me,” she said warmly. “if there is anything you need help with, you can call me.” It was necessary that there was a safety net for Cam, now that he went back to the world. Dr. Sycorah was a bit uneasy about the ammount of interest John Sheppard had taken in the whole case. He was a bit overbearing. “And if the hero gives you problems, you let me know, will you?”

“Absolutely,” Cam promised, rising to his feet and kissing her cheek. “I gotta leave the nest sometime... and I’ll keep on my meds. No reason to put me back in one of those lovely jackets. They’re so last season anyway,” he teased her.

Dr. Sycorah laughed. Cam had a wonderful humor. She led him to the waiting area and was surprised to spot John Sheppard walking in. John saw Cam and walked up to him with a wide smile.

Cam put the pills in his pocket and grinned, wide at John. “Sheppard! Good to see you!” he called out, hurrying to him. He pulled him into a hug. “Get me out of here so I can take a decent frelling shower.”

John hugged him close, so glad Cam was better. He jokingly sniffed at Cam’s neck. “Long shower,” he teased him. He let go and led Cam outside to the speeder. “Hop in and we’ll be home in no time.”

“Frell you, Hero, frell you and the speeder you came in,” Cam said as they left. He whistled and got in, leaning back. “Nothing held back, huh?” he teased. “But in all seriousness... Thanks. Thanks for getting me. Sorry I attacked you. Called you a Goa’uld, and so on and so forth.”

“Hm... if you insist on having the shower together...” John grinned at Cam, the apology made him go serious again. “Cam... listen, it wasn’t your fault. I piled you with lots of work and you did extra stuff as well. I always leaned on you... and never saw I was putting too much on your shoulders.” Green eyes met icy blue ones. “I am sorry for that. I should have been there and seen that you needed help.”

“I shouldn’t have needed help, John. I know I’m a screw up, but I shouldn’t have needed help,” he said softly, looking into his green eyes. “I should’ve been stronger and not retreated into those books...”

The sadness in those blue eyes made John’s heart pound a bit. He had failed his friend there, he should have seen that it got too much. Cam had worked double hard to justify his place in the unit. “And I should not have left you alone,” he said, reaching for his shoulder. “I knew you were pushing yourself hard and I didn’t see that it got too much.” No more, it wouldn’t happen again.

“I just can’t believe I thought the Stargate was real...” Cam said wistfully. “It would be cool, but it’s mortifying to consider I broke down that much...”

“Hey... having the gate would be cool, and mean at least another major war against those snakes.” John loved the books himself. He could see that Cam was still wrestling with being ashamed about his collapse. Only time would heal that. “Cam, it was not your fault,” he reminded him gently before he turned to start up the speeder. It was time to get Cam out of here, John disliked psych clinics.

Their drive took nearly half an hour, John had found a place outside the city proper in one of the areas where homes were strewn throughout the countryside with lots of space in-between. It was much calmer and with less people up and about all the time. The place he had found was just above the shore of Lycoras Lake.

Cam smiled wryly and nodded as they pulled away. He looked behind him, leaving the clinic behind as they drove forward. He glanced around as they left the city behind and Cam’s chest loosened, the panicked feelings lessening. Cam got out of the speeder, licking his lips as they pulled up to John’s house. “Always taking care of me, huh?”

John ducked his head, averting his eyes for a moment. “Always,” he replied after a moment. The way they stood here reminded him vividly of their first meeting years before. He could miss many things from his life, but not this, not Cam. “Let’s find you that shower,” he said, a teasing smile rising in his eyes as he led Cam inside. The house was comfy if large. John led the way upstairs and towards a room with windows to two sides overlooking the lake. “I had someone pick up your stuff at the barracks and bring it here, so it’ll be more homey,” he explained.

“No kidding. Hospital showers always leave you smelling industrial..” Cam told him, between the two of them, always in the hospital. But not everyone could be the hero... someone had to be the troublemaker. And he was good at trouble. “You’re so nice, John. Thank you.”

“Cam, you were there for me when things got rough...” they had been together in that horrible den on Mangyar. Cam’s stubborn resistance had been what had given John the strength to pull through in this hell. “it’s the least I can do.” He stepped back, to leave Cam alone, give him the time to shower and change. Or simply just sit and get some peace and quiet.

Cam smiled tightly, ducking his head. “Someone had to be, right?” he said, raising his eyebrow as he lifted his head. He took his leave, going to take a shower, looking at the fading bruising on his body. It had been a pretty epic fight. Plus the fight he gave the orderlies... Jesus, he couldn’t do anything the easy way, could he? Cam chuckled at that thought, letting the jets of water hit him at he got soapy, washing unattended for the first time in so long.

John had gone downstairs, he had ordered food prior to leaving earlier in the day. Something nice to celebrate that Cam was out of the hospital. It was different now, that they are here and not in John’s quarters at the barracks, where such celebrations usually took place. He put the food on the low table in the living room, along with some juice. Cam’s medications did not allow for alcohol, so there wasn’t any in the house.

Cam let the suds wash off  as he let the water run over him. He was home. Or as home as he had right now. He leaned his head against the shower walls, just feeling the water. There was no pressure. He wasn’t the leader of SG-1, he was just Cameron Mitchell now. Not the Earth Colonel Michael Crighton, hero of many battles and friend to the alien Jaffa. It was just some fun book series that made the horrible conflict with their real enemies, the now defeated Cartanian Race, a little further away. He was just a trouble maker pilot who got damn lucky and made friends with John Sheppard. John was the real hero. 

He shut off the water and dried off, getting into some soft workout pants and his utility shirt, already missing the power armor they used. Retirement was going to take some getting used too.

John had been sitting crosslegged on one of the chairs when Cam came in. His friend looked different without the armor. It was different now, no war, not the constant pressure of battles and dangers. He hid a smile, he had hoped that one day they could have a life outside of all that. And now... now that they were here, he knew he had to hide his other wishes more deeply than before. “I hope you brought some hunger along,” he said with a grin. “or rather... I know you do, hospital food is the same no matter where.”

“I was born hungry and I’ll die that way, John. You should know that by now, considering I’ve always eaten your spare rations,” Cam teased. He took a seat on the floor, stretching out and using this opportunity to do some light stretches. “You should’ve demanded that you keep your armor. That you keep both our armors so I could go suit up. That would be fun.”

“I think seeing you squirm because you are in civvies in fun as well,” John teased him back. “and sparring will be much more fun with fun without them too.” It took a while to get used to no having the weight of the armor settling on your body, but it wasn’t that bad.

“I hate how light I feel. It’s not natural,” Cam told him with a grin. “Are you sure you want to spar with me after that beating I gave you?” he asked, jumping up and landing on his feet. Cam hated how light it felt without the armor and even the scrubs the clinic put him in were heavier. He breathed out slightly, forcing himself to calm. He was safe and sound... with John.

“Positive,” John watched Cam bounce up and down, knowing the fierce energy his friend possessed. “you are the only one who will give me that beating, the only one who actually is good enough to kick my ass into yesterday. Against whom else would I want to spar?” He leaned back on his arms. “and... see it like that, without the armor you can do all those fancy jumps you like so much.”

“I could do them in the armor too,” Cam said with a dirty smirk. “I am pretty awesome, true... Awesome enough to keep up with you,” he told him, flipping forward and doing a handstand, walking on his hands, perfectly balanced.

Deftly John reached for Cam’s upside down head and ruffled his hair. “And you will have all the excuses in the world to drag me out for morning runs too,” he said. “there’s enough running trails around the lake to make a drill sergeant happy.”

Cam stuck his tongue out at John and grinned. “Awesome. I’m looking forward to it!” he said, finally going upright. “Shall we eat?”

“And here I was wondering why you weren’t hungry,” John teased him. “dig in, after so much hospital food you need something decent.” He had just watched as Cam jumped back to his feet, just enjoyed watching him while he bounced about. He liked watching Cam, liked observing the deadly grace of Cam’s fighting skills or the seemingly effortless agility he displayed. Oh, there was more than that, but John was careful to hide those reasons, to hide the simple fact that he liked looking at Cam. He took the jar and poured them some juice.

“Let me guess...? We can’t drink?” Cam asked, taking his juice, glad that he already had his dose of the morning. “What did you get? It smells awesome.”

“Medications and alcohol don’t mix, and then... the Docs have been pestering me to cut back on the booze because of implant they gave me after that crash on Rumilar.” John replied. “It’s Vygurian juice, you’ll like it.” John knew the mix created from several different citruis fruits from Vygur’s colonies.

“I love it,” Cam said drinking it. “Those damn implants,” he said with a grin. “Do you still get that feedback?”

“A bit,” John replied. “but not as much as it was.” They started eating enjoying the food and simply each other’s company. Whenever he could get away with it, John’s eyes would stray to Cam, a warm light shining in them. Often enough he quickly averted his gaze when their conversation picked up again. “Someone from the veteran offices, probably Mr. Jatanski, will be dropping by in a day or two, with paperwork.” John said after a while.

“Oh. Will they be assigning me a home soon?” Cam asked, spearing a piece of John’s remaining food. “You never eat enough, you know? You should eat more and faster.”

“I guess so,” John replied a bit evasive. “but you are welcome to stay here as long as you like... it’s good to have a friend around.” He pushed his plate towards Cam. “You made me eat more than anyone else in my life, you know?”

“I’m just doing my part to make sure you’re fit. But I guess your bird like eating habits will be ok now that we’re retired...” Cam told him. “Should I take that as you want me to stay here, John?”

“I would like you to stay, a lot.” John replied, much as it would not be easy to hide some things, it would be harder to miss Cam in his life. “but that doesn’t mean you have to. What would you like to do?”

“Travel back in time and not have a breakdown?” Cam told him with a smirk. “I want to stay here. I think that would be good. We can figure out the rest as we go.”

John reached over and squeezed Cam’s shoulder. He could see how much his friend was ashamed for the breakdown. “Cam,” he said softly and warmly, he rarely allowed himself to speak the name as affectionate as he wanted to, but here he did. “there is no need to be ashamed about what happened.”

“I disagree with you there, John,” Cam told him, his chest aching as he thrilled at the sound of his tone. “I am Elite. I’m not supposed to fail this bad. Of course, I wouldn’t be Elite without you taking pity on me...”

“I didn’t take pity on you,” John said firmly. “you were good, one of the damn best I’d ever seen. Okay, you had an attitude of a mile and fifty but... you knew your own mind, you were strong. That’s what makes an Elite.” He didn’t let go of Cam’s shoulder. “You didn’t fail, Cam. You did more than anyone should do alone.”

“There are several who’d disagree with you, John. General Landry for one,” Cam challenged him. “Son, you’re a blight on the history of the company. You’re weak and you’ll drag Sheppard down with you,” he mocked, mimicking the General.

John scoffed at the mention of Landry’s name. “You didn’t drag me down, Cam and you know it. Hell, I wouldn’t have walked out of some situations if not for you.” He looked up meeting his eyes. “Whenever things got bad, you were there. Knowing that you had my back was... is... it gave me the strength to go on, no matter what.” He wanted to say more, his heart ached to tell Cam what he was to him but deep down John feared to see their friendship, their closeness end and even more to see disgust in Cam’s eyes.

“You’re the hero, John. Not me. I think it was the other way around...” Cam told him, grinning shyly. “I’m the one that danced on the razor’s edge of being sent to prison for disobeying orders after all...”

“You were at home at the razor’s edge,” the shy smile drew a warm smile from John in response. “and you pulled things nobody else would have thought of trying. And you gave Landry that wonderful heart-attack. You were my hero that day.”

Cam chuckled, looking pleased. “I know it’s mean, but that is one of my finest moments...” he told him. “I needed to save you, John... What else should I have done? Other than break all the rules and possibly laws in all the books written?”

“You did save me there,” John replied, drawing Cam closer, into a short hug. “you saved me more than once,” he added, drawing back. Their eyes met and John couldn’t quite resist the temptation of feathering a light kiss on Cam’s brow. “What would I have done without you?”

Cam hugged him back, relishing the feel of John pressed against him. “I had to have someone who would keep me from getting discharged...” he teased gently. “Same for me... I don’t know where, other than prison, I would’ve ended up without you.”

John smiled at the teasing. “We both made it here...” he pointed out. “nice retirement, maybe some lectures at the Academy later on... doesn’t sound so bad.”

“They don’t want me to lecture and you know it, John,” Cam told him dryly as they started to clean up their dishes.

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that,” John replied as they set to work.

***


	2. Chapter 2

The cold light of the room reflected in the bluish tanks and the long crystal tubes running from the room. Dr. Sycorah looked at the main tank with the two bodies inside, surrounded by nuturing liquids and anything else that would keep them alive and well. The two men had linked hands in their sleep, unaware of their surroundings. “I told you that putting them together close would make them settle,” she observed, seeing the readouts from the VR. “the strong one has stopped resisting and remembering.”

Dr. Gyark rolled his eyes and nodded, agreeing with her. “You’re right, you’re always right. Please holy Goddess, give me the brain to keep up with you...” he said, sarcastically. “But it is rather different. Most of the time, the batteries don’t react like that. I take it they’re accepting the reality faster now?”

“May the Great Physician give you a second brain,” Dr. Sycorah replied dryly. “yes, they are accepting the reality now. Why? Because they are close.” She drew up another monitor, that showed a complex pattern of brainwaves and other graphs. “The moment we allowed them physically close, in the same tank, they calmed down and became immersed in the new reality, and look here - the power output their minds generate is substantially higher than any other we’ve had in here for a very long time.”

“Excellent,” Dr. Gyark said, ignoring her insult. “We’ve tried it with others... but it seems to be working with these two. This output is amazing though... I do have to admit that.... This could be the solution that we’ve been looking for. With this much power, we could probably keep them alive longer.”

“I am already working on that end,” Sycorah replied. “we’ll add more nourishment and regenerating substances to the tank’s balance, to keep their bodies viable as long as we can. The potential they have... it’s not to be squandered. It could boost our defences for a long time, if we do this right.”

Gyark grinned at her. “We will. Everything depends on this.”

***

Walter looked up the General as he came into the Control room. “Still no word from them, Sir,” he told him, wishing he had better information to give him.

General Landry frowned, he was used to delays, to a certain team being late and in trouble. But this smelled differently. “Re-call Teal’c from that conference,” he ordered. Dr. Jackson would have to do on his own there. “and have SG 11, 12 and 17 gear up for a search operation.” The planet was former Goa’uld territory, he remembered. Who knew what kind of legacy they had left on that world.

“Yes, Sir,” Walter told him, sitting up straighter in his chair as he alerted the teams and then called Teal’c.

Teal’c had taken the call from the SGC at once, while Daniel Jackson was still talking to several diplomats. He had heard of Colonel Mitchell’s vanishing already. “Was Colonel Mitchell located?” he asked, the fact that he did not wait for the other man to tell him why he was called betraying that the Jaffa was worried.

“I’m sorry to say he wasn’t. Not yet... General Landry would like you to return to help in the search,” Walter informed him. “Tell Dr. Jackson and Miss Mal Doran to stay there for the time being.”

“I will do so at once,” Teal’c replied, glad he could do something beyond waiting. He informed Daniel and Vala and then returned to speak with Walter about the quickest way to return to the SGC.

Walter made the arrangements to get Teal’c back to the base immediately.

***

Cam sat on one of the couches, knowing that Vet Affairs would be here today. He was dressed casually, finally breaking down and buying civies. Still missed his power armor.

Mr. Jatanski arrived at the house, a bit apprehensive. He had of course known that Colonel Mitchell had found a temporary home with John Sheppard. They were war-comrades after all and nobody could claim that John Sheppard did not care for his war-friends. Still, a home would be one of the things Vet Affairs should find quickly for the Colonel. A calm place, he could not handle stress according to the psych clinic. He hit the door chime and was surprised when John Sheppard opened and led him into the living room.

Cam smiled at the bureaucrat, standing up. “Mr. Jatanski. It’s been awhile. I hope you’re doing well?” he asked, seeing him seated.

“A lot of work, mainly.” Jatanski explained. “with the end of the war there is a lot of soldiers being released and integrated into civilian live again, which keeps me busy. How are you doing, Colonel?” he asked, genuinely interessted how the man was doing, it was important to know before they went on to plan his civilian future.

“Better. Take my pills everyday,” Cam told him, cheerfully. “I’m having a good time here. John needs me to tell him when to eat.”

To Jatanski’s surprise Sheppard smiled ruefully, ducking his head. The beaurocrat knew people well enough to tell that Mitchell had probably said the truth. The stars help him! He had never been surprised to note that Sheppard was on the light side of a male build, the man had a class-4 Enhancement implant in his brain-stem after all. Those ate you alive, if you were fortunate enough to survive them at all. But if bad eating habits added up to that strain... not good, definitely not. He managed a smile. “It’s good to see friends taking care of each other,” he said. “let’s get to business. The hospital informed us about your state and Vet offices is still looking for a home for you in a calm environment.”

John looked up. “That’s not necessary, he can live here. It doesn’t get any more calm than here.”

Cam looked at him, giving him a questioning look. “You sure you want me here, John?” he asked. Cam glanced at Mr. Jatanski. “Well... if it would help you, I could just stick here for the time being... then when John gets sick of me, we can look for something else.”

“I am sure, Cam.” John replied, a bit uneasy with Cam’s assumption he’d get tired of him sooner or later. Or had Cam noticed something and wanted an out?

Jatanski took some notes. “Well, Colonel, it would definitely help me out, that much is sure.” he explained. “I’ll list you as a longterm case, so we can look for the right place without hurry and will also list your residence for now here.” Which would actually allow them to work through the pile of other cases first and treat this case a bit more delicately.

“Well, problem solved,” Cam told him. “We have ice tea, if you’re thirsty...” he offered, having made some earlier.

“Thanks,” Jatanski politely took a cup, before turning to the paperwork. Mitchell had been discharged honorably, for medical reasons, with full pensions and health care. “I will need you to sign some papers, to get all the usual Vet Care under way.” he explained. “Do you have any questions?”

“Not really. I took a look over the stuff they sent home with John for me earlier. Do you have a pen?” Cam asked, looking around for a spare one.

Jatanski of couse had a pen, handing it to Mitchell, so he could sign the forms. “Ah yes... I remember that Mr. Sheppard contacted us, so your things could be moved quickly. If you need help in obtaining any other things that might be in storage somewhere, let me know.” Inheritances and the like often created such loops.

Cam chuckled. “I don’t have a family, Sir. I’ve lost more crap than I’ve ever had so I doubt there’s much except the clothes I have here... Or am I missing something?” he asked, glancing over to John.

John was not a man to squirm but Jatanski noted the man was a little uneasy. “The stuff from your place on Kholaver,” John said. “it should be on storage still.” They had been called out of Kholaver prematurely and things had been a mess. John had known Cam had not had the time to take care of his stuff, so he had seen that it was done.

Cam blinked. “Oh. I forgot all about that. I figured that was all sold off... Um, well, I suppose, Sir, that I have some things on Kholaver in storage. Do I need to fill out some other stuff for that?”

Jatanski procured another form, while Mitchell was filling it in his mind worked through what he had witnessed. The dynamic of both men was... unique. “It should not take long to actually expedite the cargo, a few weeks at most.” he said. He handed Mitchell his card. “If there are any things you need help with, or issues you have with other offices, give me a call. We’re here to help.” He did not do any ‘future profession’ talk with Mitchell, simply for the reason that the man was discharged on psychological reasons. A calm life on his good pension was probably the best for now.

Cam took the card, finishing filling out the forms. “Will do, Mr. Jatanski. Thank you for getting all this crap done.”

Jatanski rose, shaking his hand and then took his leave. John rolled his eyes. “Vet Affairs seems to be swamped with work these days.” he observed.

“Lots of knuckleheads like us getting out I suppose,” Cam told him. “War’s mostly over. They don’t need as many people...”

“I guess so.” John straightened up from his lazy posture. “I am glad you are staying here, Cam. I really am.”

Cam licked his lips. “I’m really glad too, John. Thanks for letting me stay... It means a lot.”

John rose. “How about we go outside? Take a look at all the nice grounds you can chase me over?”

Cam grinned. “Well, that depends. Do you have your compass? I know how you get lost,” he teased, getting to his feet. “Let’s go, walk the grounds.”

“I don’t get lost,” John pouted. “I take detours.” They went outside, the grounds around the lake were huge, with pathways winding up and down the hillsides. There was little in terms of other people here, the next houses were several miles away on the other side of the lake.

“Detours... right,” Cam scoffed at him as they walked together. “It’s... It’s nice. Here. When did you buy this?”

“Three weeks ago,” John replied honestly. He had bought it not long after the ceremony, after some search for a place that was calm, quiet, with little stress in terms of people. “a friend lives over on the other side of the lake and he actually told me the place was up for sale.”

“Oh. I see. Well, I want to thank you. For letting me stay here,” Cam told him, shyly. “Who is your friend?”

Inwardly john sighed, he was so happy to have Cam here and he didn’t want his friend to feel like he was burden. “Cam, I am glad you are here,” he said warmly. “I had hoped to find a place for both of us, or a place where we both might be staying somewhere close once you retired. It just came a bit earlier.” He looked out on the lake, for a moment hesitating to answer the second question. But he wouldn’t lie to Cam either. “Shaun Mahanay,” he admitted. “his house is over there at Siligan Point.”

“You know the author to the Gate books?” Cam asked, surprised. “That’s... That’s amazing. Wow... “

“His father and mine are friends,” John replied. “we’ve known each other since childhood.” He could guess what his friend worried about, he knew him well enough. “Shaun has no idea that his books figured into your collapse, nobody knows.” He told him.

Cam’s ears flushed. “Good... That’s good. Thank you for that. Although, I don’t know how that would even come up in conversation anyway... Still, that’s pretty cool. Do you think he based any of his characters on you?”

“On me? No... I doubt it.” John replied. “My father maybe, but me... nope.” He winked at Cam. “Or did you think he did?”

“The second leader. Michael... he seems a lot like you. Heroic, brave... a leader,” Cam told him, his ears flushing deeper red.

If he was brutally honest Michael had reminded John of Cam, a lot. But he couldn’t say that. Not after what happened. The way Cam blushed admitting that, made John smile though. It was one of those moments where it was so hard to resist to just wrap his arms around him and not let go again. Instead he just stepped a bit closer. “Now you are flattering me,” he told him. “but you were a fan of Michael Crighton... should I conclude you were one of me as well?” he asked, teasing him a small bit.

“I stayed in the Elites, didn’t I? Even after the disaster on Iolun Prime. I think I’m a big damn fan, my friend,” Cam told him. “If we’re comparing... I think I’m more like Gabriel Saxon of the Lost City series.”

The mention of Iolun Prime made John look down for a moment. “Forgive me, my friend, I shouldn’t have said that. You stayed, no matter what and I was very glad you did.” He looked up again. “Gabriel... maybe, but honestly, I think Dean Cantarre was more like you, a hero with your attitude.” And a hero John always had a weakness for.

“John... There’s nothing to forgive... I know how you meant it,” Cam told him. He grinned widely. “I’m nothing like that character... I mean, other than the obvious parts...”

John reached for Cam’s hand squeezing it lightly. “You are... but what’s even better: you are you. I’d miss you far too much, so never trade places with anyone, okay?” He said with a smile. Cam was important to him, and no one, no hero or legend could replace him.

Cam’s ears flushed again as John touched him. He smiled at him. “Hey... you remember that one time on Vark Prime?” he asked, trying to calm his heart down from pounding.

John blushed fiercely, remembering Prince Julian and all that had happened. He had been close to staying, he had liked Julian a lot but... but for one person he would have stayed. “How could I forget that?” he asked Cam, their eyes meeting and John’s heart jumped a bit. Cam had found a way for him to get out of being bonded...

“Have you considered returning to him? You seemed interested...” Cam asked, slightly testing the waters. “I got to thinking about that place just yesterday... and how that report must have made Landry’s blood boil...”

“Landry got all blushy and maybe hot and bothered,” John replied, amused at the idea what the report of their mission might have done to the General. “But no... I told Julian I was promised to another, so that we couldn’t be bonded.” He stepped closer and feathered a kiss on Cam’s cheek. “I wouldn’t break this promise to another for anything.” he said softly, before hastily stepping away.

Cam blushed, his ears turning bright red and his cheeks heating. He grasped John’s wrist, stopping him from stepping away. “Did you... Me, John?”

It took all John’s courage to meet Cam’s eyes. He’d have rather faced a whole Catharian army alone and laughed at the odds of survival, but the thought of loosing Cam’s friendship was one that made his guts curl. Still, he didn’t step away. “You,” he confirmed softly. “I love you, Cam. You are my best friend and.... you the one I love.”

Cam looked at him, astonished. “But... John... I’m not... Worthy. I’m me, John... and you’re too good for that... I’m not good enough for you...”

The words spoke of so much self-doubts, it shocked John a bit. Did Cam think so badly of himself? Or did he just think far too highly of John? The result was the same. He drew Cam a bit closer. “That’s not true, Cam.” he said gently. “You are you, and you are the only one I want.” He met his eyes, not sure how Cam felt about it. “Maybe you are the one I can’t have but that doesn’t change how I feel about you.”

Cam looked at him. “John... I...” he said, swallowing as he took a chance, knowing that his CO did want him and leaned forward, kissing him deeply on the lips.

John wrapped his arms around Cam, responding to the kiss passionately. His heart was dancing with joy in this moment.

Cam pressed his body into John’s, kissing him as he felt the rough skin of his jaw. This was far better than even he had imagined... This wonderful, wonderful kiss.

Their lips broke apart and John had a hard time to not gasp. Feeling Cam’s strong arms around him, he didn’t want to let go of their embrace. He tilted his head and captured Cam’s lips in a second kiss, slowly exploring those gorgeous lips with his tongue.

Cam kissed him again, his hands slipping down to cup John’s ass. “You’re... Amazing... Amazing.”

John moaned into their kiss, both his arms wrapped around Cam’s waist. “As are you,” he whispered against his lips. “as are you.” It seemed like a dream come true, much too good to be true. He reached up to cup Cam’s cheek with his hand, feeling the warm skin and the slight trace of stubbles under his fingers. “Maybe I should take a leaf out of Vark’s traditions and lure you to my den?” he asked, teasing him a little.

Cam chuckled. “I would like to be lured into your den... have you debase me...” he teased, grinning at him. “All sorts of naughty things to me.”

“Lots of naughty things,” John agreed, his arm still wrapped around Cam’s waist as they walked back towards the house. It was a slow march, because John couldn’t resist stopping to snatch another kiss now and then. When they reached the house again, he drew Cam close to purr into his ear: “I like naughty... naughty is always good and you are an expert at being naughty, are you?”

Cam gave him a smirk and kissed him deeply. “Yes, Sir. Definitely, definitely an expert at being naughty,” he said, his eyes dilating in arousal with John taking control.

It was not hard to read Cam’s reactions, John nibbled on his earlobe as they both ended up in John’s bedroom. Kicking the door close, John pushed Cam against the wall, his hand snaking down to his pants, rubbing against the hard bulge. “You are so ready...” he growled, rubbing him through the cloth. “trapped and all mine.”

Cam moaned, thrusting forward. “Yes.. I’m all yours, Sheppard. What are you going to do about it?” he challenged, only superficially resisting.

John stopped rubbing Cam for a moment to quickly open his pants and push them down. Curling his fingers around Cam’s hard dick he played with him, gingerly coaxing more moans out of him. “Maybe I should find some use for your insolent mouth?” he whispered, his tongue and lips tracing Cam’s throat.

Cam moaned out as John’s fingers wrapped around his cock. He panted and nodded. “I think that would be good idea, Commander...” Cam told him..

“Do you?” John lightly rubbed his thumb around the underside of the Cam’s dick before suddenly letting go and actually releasing him from being pinned. “Let’s see if you do,” he said, his tone a bit more like the Commander he had been to the Elites. “Undress and then get to your knees... show me you mean it.”

Cam shuttered, his cock going even harder as he rubbed the underside. When John let go, he exhaled sharply and immediately straightened. “Yes, Sir,” he told him, undressing as he kept his eyes on John. Cam stood naked, his cock hard and his glance hungry. He sank to his knees before him. Cam reached up, undoing John’s pants, pulling out his cock and started licking.

John licked his lips watching Cam undress, it took some control to just watch and not join him to pull off his clothes and kiss every inch of that warm skin. When Cam started licking his cock, John bit his lip to not moan out loudly. Instead he ran his hand through Cam’s hair, not really forcing anything but still there.

Cam glanced up at him as he wrapped his lips around John’s cock and started sucking up and down.

It was simply impossible to keep the moans back. John had a hard time to not jerk his hips forward. “Gods... such a talented mouth...” he moaned out, feeling the hot wetness engulf him. “such a hot, talented mouth...” it didn’t take him long to feel his balls tighten and to explode.

Cam swallowed his cock, deep throating his dick. As John ejaculated, he sucked it down, swallowing every last drop.

John panted, going limp. He grabbed Cam’s shoulders, drawing him up to kiss him fiercely, not minding his own taste on Cam’s lips. He made a point of licking them clean before gently pushing Cam down on the broad comfy bed. John shrugged off his own clothes and joined him, returning some attention to Cam’s leaking dick, by gently playing with his balls. “So ready...” he whispered, not quite relinquishing control, seeing how much it turned Cam on. “do you want to come?”

Cam kissed him back and then flopped down on the bed. He grinned, watching him undress, hissing and thrusting up as John touched him. “Yesss, so ready... Yes, Sir. I want to come. Please Sir... Please let me come.”

He was so ready but John wanted this to last a bit, so he leaned down, tracing his tongue over his balls, sucking them gently, playing with them before he did the same with the rock hard dick.

Cam shuddered as he gently sucked his balls. He hissed as he started sucking on his cock. “Yes, Sir... Yes, Sir. Oh fuck, John... Yesss.”

John took him down deep sucking on his cock, using his tongue to lick and tease the hard errection. One hand snaked up and rubbed Cam’s balls the same time. He loved to feel how Cam came apart with pleasure.

“John... John... I’m going to come...” he breathed out, panting as he got closer and closer.

Feeling that Cam was close John sucked him more intensely, doing all he could to push Cam over the edge, wanting him to loose himself to this.

Cam thrust up and shuddered, coming as he went limp. “Gods be damned...” he breathed out, laying on the bed.

John grinned as he lay down beside Cam, wrapping his arms around him. “Don’t care about gods.... not when I have you,” he said, kissing his cheek.

Cam smiled, relaxing into his embrace, falling asleep.

***

Dr. Sycorah walked into the center of the machine to check the systems. The poweroutput was staggering. Ever since they had placed those two into the same tank it was rising. She stepped close to the brightly lit tank. The two bodies inside were curled close to each other, holding each other while their minds were deeply immersed into the VR. A monitor above the tank showed the complex patterns that formed their dreamworld. Their minds were strongly interwoven, meashed in many places and the machine took that information to make the dream more real, more feasible. Something of course were based on assumptions. The dark one strongly displayed characteristics of the Ancients, which naturally meant that he was the leader, while the other was common baseline human.

She shrugged, so many things were assumptions when they were setting up a new powersource. But actually making the resets part of a nervous breakdown, of a delusion was genius, if she might say so. The concepts this one’s mind could not let go of were now part of their dreamworld, as something not real. This way his subconscious would hopefully stop to interfere. With that power output they would bring the defence systems up to maximum in no time.

It would be necessary to prolong their lives, Sycorah pondered. It would not do for them to die within a few months, not if they were such good sources. She would need to speak to the council to actually procure the resources to extend their lives, push back their expiry. For now she just could say everything was running smoothly.

Evan Lorne checked his rounds, glancing over to Teal’c as they got ready in the Gate Room. “How long did SG-3 wait to report back?” he asked, not liking that Colonel Sheppard was missing and still quite pissed about Atlantis being on Earth. But it wasn’t like it was Teal’c who made all those decisions.

“They searched for several hours, initially, then tried activating the obelisk on their own and ultimately reported back at their next check - in, ten hours later. The first search with several teams did not bring any other results, but a day was lost.” Teal’c informed him steadily, only his eyes betrayed the Jaffa’s frustration with the lost time. “The obelisk is the key to their vanishing but it will need activation through the Lantean Gene.”

Evan nodded tightly. “Which is what I’m here for,” he said dryly. “Let’s get our friends back, Teal’c.”

The Jaffa replied with a curt nod and took the lead through the gate. On the other side were two of the search teams which were back from their long and fruitless search in the hills. Except for some nods exchanged there was nothing else said as they headed out. Only when they were traversing the hilly grounds leading towards the stone obelisk, the Jaffa spoke again. “You seem angered, Major Lorne.” it was an observation he had made in the younger warrior’s demeanour, even as he tried to hide it.

Evan looked up at him. “That obvious?” he asked. “Sorry. I’m just aggravated at this entire mess, with Atlantis on Earth, our people getting reassigned... Plus, while he’s my CO... Colonel Sheppard is still a friend. I’m concerned about him-” he suddenly cut off, feeling something ache in his mind. “Whatever is here, is very, very loud...” Evan whispered, knowing Ancient Tech... and this was like someone screaming in his head.

Teal’c understood very well, to him Cameron Mitchell was a friend too, someone he’d not leave in danger. He had grown as close to him as the other team-members who had by and by been moving to take other tasks. He noticed the change in Lorne’s demeanour, only able to guess that it was something beyond his own sharp senses. “You can hear the obelisk already, Major Lorne?” he asked.

“Yes. It’s active and very much so. I’ve never had this much of a connection before... but it’s definitely Ancient Tech. John must be near it,” he told him, calming himself and insuring that he wasn’t a liability on this mission.

The Jaffa warrior took the information calmly, not rushing the Major. It was a mistake often made, pressuring those who had such skills into premature action. “Do not haste yourself, Major Lorne.” he said in his deep voice. “The obelisk vanished our friends, the more you understand it, the better we can find them.”

“There has to be something more... It’s active, whatever it really is...” Evan told him, grateful for the look of understanding Teal’c had. “Should we go closer... see what it is?” he asked, knowing that wasn’t the best course, but it was all they had.

The Jaffa inclined his head to the suggestion but slowed down his pace much, so Lorne could study the Obelisk better while they approached. To the Jaffa the Obelisk was simply that: a spire of dark stone, cut in geometric patterns that he had also seen on some walls in Atlantis, along with some writings on the polished surface. The writings were not deciphered yet, as they were no regular Ancient letters or language.

“It’s really strong here...” Evan said, feeling like he was trapped in a fog. He touched the Obelisk, seeing it light up under his hands as he pushed at it lightly, trying to figure out what the hell it did to Colonel Sheppard.

Teal’c stood close to the Major, ready to defend if necessary. Whatever this Obelisk had done, he doubted it was harmless.

Evan gasped as a white light hit them as they were transported into a lab of some sort. He felt dizzy and disoriented as he stumbled forward. “What is this place?”

The Jaffa felt the same dizziness but shook it off much faster, fast enough to use his weapon on the two attackers storming into the room. They were not human, or other species for that matter, they were machines. Silvery machines, hovering midair, armed and able to attack. The first gunshots proved only semi-efficient, but at least pushed them back long enough for the Jaffa to move closer and grab the first by one of it’s arms, smashing it into the second. They were not very durable, because several more hard contacts with the wall made them tumble down in demolished junk. Using the short reprieve they had Teal’c hurried back to his companion. “Major Lorne, are you alright?” he asked.

Evan looked around, his head much clearer. “I’m fine. Must be a temporary side effect. Gives them time to grab you...” he said, holding his weapon. “We’d better hurry. It won’t be long until they start the alarms blaring,” Evan said softly, cursing his luck that the other team didn’t get swept up with them.

Teal’c agreed silently. He was glad to see that Major had not suffered any damage from the Obelisk. With Ancient devices one never knew what they would do. Together they moved out into a long corridor of the same silvery metal. It twisted and they reached a junction just in time to evade a column of those hovering machines racing towards where they had come from. When they had passed them, as they crouched down in the side corridor, Teal’c turned to Lorne. “Colonel Mitchell and Sheppard are either fleeing or fighting as well,” he observed in a whisper. “we need to learn more about this place to find them.” The Jaffa was as calm and unfazed as always, the thought that they were only two in the middle of enemy territory did not shake him. He had a very competent warrior at his back, it was enough.

“Has to be,” Evan said, glad for his observation. “I hate to suggest this... but we could go the way they came... There might be a command center of some sort...”

Something akin to a smile broke the stern mien of the Jaffa. “It will be something they do not expect of their prey,” he replied, getting up. They followed the group of machines down the corridor back towards the room where the Obelisk had deposited them. Two were hovering near the entrance, the others were inside. Teal’c moved behind one of the hovering machines, to use it as shield as he grabbed the steel centurion's weapon’s arm and fired the gun on the next machine. The blue flash from the machine weapon proved much more efficient then their own guns.

Evan grinned. “Easy and even easier. Let’s hope they sent all their toys out already,” he told him as he opened the command center, slipping inside.

Teal’c took a closer look at the fallen machines and found that the gun could be removed from their hand. He aimed it at the one he had taken it from and fired, the blue flash melting the destroyed machine. He grabbed a second one from another wrecked machine for Lorne and followed him into the room. It was full of devices and systems that made little to no sense to the Jaffa. “Can you find their surveillance system?” he asked, hoping the Major had a clue what those systems were.

“I can try... but I’m surprised that there’s tech like this in Milky Way...” he said, heading to the console and holding the new weapon. Evan looked at the readouts, wishing he had someone more familiar with these systems with him. Luckily for him, he was pretty quick to pick up things. “I think I know why the Goa’uld never took this over... We’re in a protected city.”

Teal’c kept his silence, there had been a few advanced civilisations they had encountered in the Milky Way, so he was not too surprised to find another. “A protected city?” he asked. “Their technology was strong enough to resist the System Lords?”

“Their tech is strong enough that they can’t be found, unless the Obelisk allows them in. The only reason we got in was I activated it and you were close enough to get swept up in the teleportation wave. I think we might be somehow out of phase.. but I’m not sure. I only have a loose grasp of how this works here.”

The Jaffa took the information calmly. “It gives us a start, Major Lorne,” he replied. “Can you find out where Colonel Mitchell and Sheppard are?” They would need to find them first and then find a way to teleport out of the city again.

“I’m afraid not... but I’m still getting a sense of how it even works. Dr. McKay would cream himself to get to this...” Evan told him. “Or even Colonel Sheppard. He has a better genetic link than I do...” he said, focusing on Colonel Sheppard, wondering if that could help.

Teal’c shook his head. “But you are here, Major Lorne and they need you.” He said, then fell silent when he saw the Major focus on something not quite here. Suddenly a system flared up, a holograph showing a strange room full of tanks and tubes.

Evan looked at him, lowering his eyes briefly and nodded, pushing himself. He looked up and saw the holograph light up. “They’re there,” he said, trying to get the systems to give him more. “Map... We have a map!” he said with triumph as the map appeared beside the display.

“Well done, Major Lorne.” Teal’c’s eyes scanned the map, searching for the best way from their location to them. He suddenly frowned noticing the two shapes inside the tank. “They were put in that device, Major.” There was an echo of anger in the Jaffa’s voice, he did not allow himself to watch the picture further but went back to the map, quickly selecting the possible routes they could take.

Evan memorized the map then saw his CO trapped beside Colonel Mitchell as it magnified upon his intense look. “They’re hooked into it... What the hell are they doing to them?” he asked, seeing their nudity. “I think we should take this passage here... I might be able to sabotage the systems...” he told him, thinking destruct at the machines.

it didn’t need a genius to see some of the machines shutting down, others starting to work in erratic patterns. Agreeing with Lorne, Teal’c followed him down the passage they had chosen.

Cam felt the hairs on his head stand up. He rose from his bed, running down the halls. “John! Weapons! Now, Sir!” he yelled, trying to wake him up. Cam went to weapons cabinet, sliding his hand across it as he armed himself, cursing that there was something not right. Not here. Not now. “JOHN!” he shouted as weapons blasts started hitting the house. He got behind some cover and starting to fire back.

John had woken slower until the explosion shook the grounds. Blast it! Someone was attacking the city! He jumped up and joined Cam, grabbing guns. Outside he could see fires blazing, several buildings were aflame, and enemy troops were advancing towards their point. He could hear a hard, rattling gunfire that had to be the enemy weapons. “Cam, Sinorah barracks is about a mile from, we need to get there, join with the troops.” He said.

“Will they let us?” Cam asked, glancing at him, already working on gathering supplies. He spared a glance outside. “I think they’ve moved...”

“They will need every damned fighter they can get,” John could see that the city must be in dire straits because the main spire was ablaze, and other buildings too. Several battlegrounds, several fight groups attacking, but no clear aim to their target as of yet. They made it out of the house and in the cover of the fence towards the small wall by the road. John jumped across it, gunning down two attackers, who had been posted there, probably waiting for troops moving up the road. They wore strange uniforms of green and black.

Cam smirked. “Good point,” he told him. He covered John as they looked at the men. “What the hell sort of uniform is that?” Cam asked, frowning. Had... had he seen something like that before?

“No idea, unknown enemy, human classification,” John replied, quickly taking stock of the fallen invader. “Triangular symbol with a circle above seems to be their banner of sorts. I hope like hell, that intelligence knows something on them.” Another group was moving up the road and coming towards them. John raised his gun, using their position for an ambush.

“I didn’t piss them off this time,” Cam told him, falling back and flanking to protect their backs as more of the enemy came towards them. He aimed, carefully watching and looking for one that was in control.

It was not hard to spot the leader, a huge dark-skinned warrior who cut through several infanterists who had reached the road as well, with an ease and disregard that was frightening. John could see that this crossroads quickly became locked in a battle, as not only the enemy but also some of their own troops arrived, but their own people were much too quickly overwhelmed by the enemy.

Cam looked at him then to John. “He’s big... I think I can hit him,” he announced, glancing down his scope as he inhaled, firing as the lead soldier went down. The others started firing at them as Cam switched his weapon to rapid fire, killing more and more of them.

John grinned when the leader went down, firing as well. For a moment he saw one of their officers through his scope, a light-haired man that looked somewhat familiar... like someone he had seen before, but still he fired, taking him down. They had to get through this quickly. When the last of the soldiers was dead they moved out, up the road and towards the barracks. But it did not take long that they encountered the next group of enemies. When John saw their leader, he only just had the presence of mind to take cover. “It can’t be...” they had just killed him down the road. Had they?

“What the fuck?” Cam whispered, knowing he had killed him. He gritted his teeth and started firing, mowing them down and ducking shots. “Clones?” he asked as they ducked some fire from the enemy.

“Possibly,” John replied grimly, as they trailed behind a ledge to dodge shots. They found a spot that was easier to defend in a half-burned house. “Would explain why it feels like I should know them.”

“I know what you mean... They are familiar, but I don’t understand why it feels like we should know them...” Cam told him. “Mind helping a man understand?” he asked, staying low.

John exhaled sharply, his head was pounding, much as he tried to hide that fact from Cam. “I don’t know... it just feels like I should know their 2IC, that light-haired one. Like I DO know him... but I can’t place it. Except if we fought them before and our memories were altered for security reasons.”

“Then why the hell are they attacking us? If we know them...?” Cam asked. “John... Are you ok?” he questioned, seeing the stress lines on his face.

John put down his gun for a moment, leaning it against the broken stones, his hands were shaking. Never would he have allowed anyone to see him like that. “I... I can’t say. But part of me is reeling that I killed that one... like I should know I can’t, shouting at me to stop... and I know I have to fight.” He looked at Cam his green eyes wide. “Am I going crazy?” he asked in a whisper.

“Like me, you mean?” Cam asked. “You’re not the only one though... I feel like I murdered those colonists all over again...” he told him. “John. You’re not going crazy... When you go crazy, you can’t tell.”

Reaching up John squeezed Cam’s shoulder, the memory about the colonists was one that was hard to bear for Cam. “We need answers and intel,” he said after a moment, still the leader, the commander. “We’ll evade them and make our way to the barracks, they have a security outpost there as well, if those attackers are known...” A strange flash occured before his eyes, an unknown corridor, silvery lights... pain. He breathed out, praying that his mind was not leaving him entirely. He couldn’t let Cam down.

“Understood,” Cam told him as he reached out and squeezed his arm. “C’mon. Let’s go,” he said softly. “You’re going to be alright. These guys are just... they’re playing with us. Our heads.”

John nodded silently and they moved out, dodging the enemy group and making their way along the destroyed settlement towards the barracks. It was not easy, enemy groups appearing again and again, like an endless pattern. John struggled to keep his focus on the fight, and not allow his mind to return back to that silvery corridor he kept seeing.

Cam kept moving, staying low and close to his Commander.

The explosion rocked the grounds, stone slabs and concrete beams broke down, levelling then playing flield at least a little. Which was not saying much - they were still up against damn high odds. John pushed another mag into his raygun and kept on firing. They were barely covering the entrance to the street that lead towards headquarters and there was a whole bunch of troops after them. Finding about the enemy strength, disposition and numbers was still the primary task, but the longer this fighting the went, the more it puzzled John. Something did not add up, not about those attackers, not about their totally off tactics and certainly about how they got into the city. How had they breached the outer world defences and bypassed the fleet? There was only one answer to that, and that indicated treason.

The fire got heavier, as another wave of foreign soldiers arrived invariably clad in their green and black clothes. Unpractical, why did they not wear armor? John kept firing, weeding out what came their way, knowing that his friend was doing his job and had his back. He always knew that Cam had his back. Cam was further up still,his supporting fire holding back a lot of enemy troops. He had been the one to land that marvelous hit on that wretched leader again - the modifications to the weapons they had at home were certainly paying off. John’s enhanced vision spotted a movement, there were more enemies coming in.

Cam swore low as he saw the situation. "Shit," he said, jumping down to join his friend. "Keep firing. If it gets to be too much, we fall back." Cam ordered as he ran out of his charge and put another one into his weapon.

"Good plan," John had by now learned that their enemies were less accepting of suicide runs than they themselves were, they kept evading instead of wasting several hundred men to breach their fire curtain. He focused on firing in rapid succession, many of the soldiers that tried to mount the stairs leading up to the crossroads, fell as had others before. The dead piled up further down and would soon... they would soon be enough to provide cover for the attackers. "Cam - we need to get rid of the bodies," he contacted his second in command.

"No grenades left, John - I am down to nanos since my stay in hospital. Do we risk it?" Cam asked.

John understood the question, few were not aware about the extend of nanos in their bodies, and what they could do if necessary. And Cam’s nanos had been depleted after his long stay in hospital. "No - nanos are too slow, I have a better idea. Cover me." He got up, jumped foreward, roll over the ground and down the stairs, it was an exercise on speed, he still took hits, relying on his enhancements to deal with that, another jump through the air, across a barrier of rubble and he reached one of their dead, taking his weapon. Picking it up he cut his hand on it, infecting it with enough specialists nanos and threw it down, to the piles of corpses. He had only moments to get up and into cover - because the weapon exploded and ripped apart the piles of corpses along with a lot of enemy soldiers.

Cam was busy fighting when he felt the shake of the explosion. "John?!" he yelled into his radio, looking at the smoke billowing up from below him. "John! Status report!" he told them as he held the line.

John had rolled over the edge of broken wall and landed hard. He kept firing, keying the radio between shots. "Alive and acounted for,," reported back, knowing that Cam could not see him from his position. There were more soldiers coming but they had weeded their ranks out a bit.

Cam breathed out a sigh of relief. "Any luck yet?!" he yelled, hoping someone was getting somewhere. Not that he didn't just love being ass deep in enemy soldiers. It'd be damn nice if he was back at full fighting strength and had at least a clue what this was about. Or John should have a clue... someone needed a clue.

Cam looked at the battlefield. "I think I got an idea..." he said, jumping off where he had been standing and grabbing a long sharp crystal splinter from one of the buildings, that could easily serve a fighting weapon. One of the enemy leaders had been taken out but not the other. Finally spotting him, he threw the weapon, hitting him in the throat and impaling him on the tree. "Give them everything you've got!" he ordered, hoping this did something.

John reacted at once moving out, spearheading towards a formation of fighters that was about to break their way towards the road. With their leader going down, impaled by Cam's amazing throw, the troops got in a bit of a disorder. Knowing that Cam was following him down, hearing the gunfire, he began clearing the way towards their target. It was tough, but by and by they forced their way through the enemy lines onwards down the road. It was tough, he had never encountered so many enemies once, with so little backup. Where the hell were the other troops? Reinforcements? The local guard?

They reached another junction, closer to the barracks, taking cover between the rubble of what had once been a convinience store, trying to spy out the next enemy movements when it happened. John saw the troops moving in - again led by that dark man. He had just raised his gun to fire when a person - a child that had been hiding under a ruin close by, jumped up and tried to run away. The dark man turned around and fired... the small body was whirled through the air and crashed down close to them.

John wasted no time on one collataral, not with the same damned repetive enemy troop that again was advancing on them. He wished he had his armor to handle the damage, but they needed to keep moving. "Cam, follow me, we can’t get pinned down," he ordered, him andCam tackling the enemy soldiers again, not caring that it was not the first time they had to kill them..

Cam's eyes widened in horror as the child died, his mind going somewhere else as skill and instinct took over, killing everyone that remained in their path. He was a man... no, a demon, cutting a swath through their forces in his grief and rage.

John would always admit that it had been Cam who had made their retreat possible - he ripped through the ranks of the enemy with a fierce rage that was impressive, he killed the remaining troops, not caring how many there were. They made it through, reaching the other side of the barracks, but the place was empty. And they still had some more enemies coming at them.

Evan ducked fire as he loaded another clip, then started shooting more robots down. Their style had changed... It was much better than before. “Colonel Sheppard is controlling these things... I just... I know it.”

Teal’c fired his gun, dodged a second robot and used him as a weapon against a third one. Major Lorne’s assessment surprised him, but also drew memories of several aliens that had captured SG1 and tried to use them for similar purposes. “We need to reach the chamber and free them,” He stated. “if Colonel Sheppard is controlling our enemies, how can we get past them?” It was not an idle question, no one knew better how to outsmart a commander than his own 2IC.

“Something big. He’ll be expecting a distraction, but I think we’ll be able to use his weakness. We need to get Colonel Mitchell away from him, separate and leave Sheppard alone. He’ll do anything to save his people and right now, that’s Mitchell.”

“They seemed connected in the tank,” The Jaffa answered, as they sneaked around a corner and down another corridor. “do you think we should seperate them in there, Major Lorne?” Or maybe the Major with his affinity for the tech understood better what to do. Maybe taking Mitchell out of the tank first would make Sheppard power down the defences.

“Maybe. Or we do something really stupid, connect me to the machine and I’ll try it that way,” Lorne told him. “There are other alcoves, other areas that are set up the same way. But we need to get Mitchell away from him.”

The tall Jaffa took that suggestion thoughtful while he finally locked the door that led to the room with the tanks. “Are you sure that is wise, Major Lorne?” he asked, his own experiences with a VR that would not let him go, were nothing Teal’c had forgotten easily. “You are the only one who can influence those systems. Maybe I should try to get Colonel Mitchell away from him?” Deep down Teal’c shied away from the thought of again being lost in a merciless machine, but a warrior was never deterred by fear.

“I know it’s not wise. But I can’t stand here, shooting these tinker toys when we have a way of dealing with them. If you tear him away, you might end up killing him... You might be able to monitor it from the outside...” Evan told him, hoping like hell this worked. “Get me out if I get too deep...”

Teal’c could see that Lorne was set on it. He nodded silently, seeing it was their only way to deal with the problem. Keeping his eyes on the strange monitors of the alcove, he watched as Lorne joined the strange system.

Evan sighed, seeing the alcove and stepped in, seeing it seal around him as his eyes rolled back in his head and he was thrown into the reality before him. He ducked down, running as he spotted them. Evan paused, seeing himself and Teal’c fighting. Oh hell. They used their images to identify him and Teal’c as enemies. Well. Ok. He would be a bad guy. Evan crept closer, thinking hard as he was granted a weapon. He fired and stunned them both, grabbing Cameron and carrying him off in a fireman’s carry and hurrying away.

John woke from the daze realising that Cam was gone. Only the years and years of training enabled him to not freeze in shock. They had taken Cam! His Cam... He pushed himself up, grabbing his weapon. He’d not allow them to get away with that, he’d rescue Cam and then deal with those damned invaders. His heart was still racing as a plan formed in his mind. He knew where to follow, not quite how he knew, but he KNEW. And he took up the chase.

Evan hid in a cave, checking the ropes around Colonel Mitchell’s wrists and ankles as he waited for him to come around.

Cam grunted, waking up as he glanced around. “Release me immediately!”

“I can’t do that, Colonel Mitchell. You’re not who you think you are. This isn’t real.”

Cam scoffed. “You don’t even have your facts straight. I never made it to Colonel. Whoever you are, you’re not going to turn me and I will not be captured alive for your Masters.”

Evan looked at him, at a bit of a loss. “Ok. They turned your head even more than I expected,” he said with a sigh. He touched his head. “Sorry, Sir. But you need to wake up.”

***


	3. Chapter 3

Cam gasped, finding himself naked in a round tube, the feel of another body directly behind him and tubes... tubes in his skin. “What the fuck?” he asked, putting his hands on the tube as he tried to move, finding himself mostly stuck. “Let me out!!” Cam shouted into the breath mask.

John had nearly reached the cave when he heard Cam scream, part of that scream was not from this world anymore and deep down the Colonel feared that his friend was gone, lost forever. But then he again saw that corridor knowing with a strange clarity that Cam was there, somewhere inside that silver light. Without a moment’s hesitation John let go of this world, following the silvery light.

He found himself inside a liquid, another body struggling against him, tubes breathing into him. He reached for that other body, trying to calm him.

Teal’c heard the scream, seeing Cam wake up inside the tank. He used his gun to smash the tank surface, broke the shards away with his hands, disregarding the cuts, making enough room to lift Cam out of the gel safely, removing the breathing tube once Cam was above the surface. Gently lifting him out, once he was not connected to the machine anymore.

Cam calmed as soon as he felt the gentle touch of the one next to him. He felt hands lift him up from the gel as breathed in and out, trying to calm down as adrenaline shot through his system. “T-Teal’c?”

The Jaffa helped him to sit down beside the tanks. “Colonel Mitchell,” only the tone of the words betrayed how relieved the warrior was to find his friend alive. The Jaffa had seen the other alcove power down and letting Major Lorne out. “Major Lorne will be getting Colonel Sheppard out of the machine as well.” he said, trying to calm his friend.

Evan lifted the tube, panting as he rushed to Colonel Sheppard’s side, helping him out and unplugging the tubes and the breathing mask. “You’re going to be alright, Sir. Just breathe,” he told him as he got John out and onto the floor.

Cam looked at him, feeling his hair crawl. “Machine?”

John collapsed on the floor coughing up some of the gel. “Cam... need to find him...” only then he realised where he was. “Evan?” he asked in a whisper. “Oh god... I shot you...”

“The inhabitants of this world captured you inside a machine, Colonel Mitchell.” Teal’c replied, while he helped Cam to get rid of the remaining gel. He knew that Mitchell had read heaps of mission reports, knew them by heart, he’d find the comparisons quickly himself. “The obelisk teleported you here and you were captured.”

“Teal’c... I killed you...” Cam whispered. “I killed you,” he told him, his hands shaking.

Evan looked at him. “It wasn’t me, Sir. They were trying to turn you against us. Colonel Mitchell is just over there...” he told him.

“You did not, Cameron Mitchell.” Teal’c stated firmly, reminding him that he was right here in front of him. “It was not real.”

John looked over to Cam, realising what had happened inside the simulations, how they had turned everything upside down and... he blushed fiercely and ducked his head. “We better get out of here, Lorne,” he said, his stubbornness returning full force. “Before those guys can regroup.”

Cam looked at him and forced himself to recover. “It wasn’t real. God, Teal’c,” he said as he pushed himself to his feet. “Clothing?” he asked.

“We might not have to worry... You were powering the defense systems, Sir.”

Teal’c handed Mitchell a pair of BDU pants and a T-Shirt from his backpack. John, having received similar help, dressed too. “Good. So we just need to find a way out of here, right?” He tried to keep on the problem, not to think back about the things that had happened inside the simulation.

Cam glanced at Teal’c, dressing quickly and pulled his boots on. “John... You ok?” he asked, his mouth dry.

“I... I am okay, Sir.” John forced himself to react normal, as he was expected to be. He tied the second boot and got to his feet. “I think... I think I can sense the obelisk, it’s like an echo in mind...” he added, focusing more on what he could feel from the tech surrounding them.

“Get us out of here then. You and Lorne have got this, right? Let’s get the hell out before we get sucked back in.”

John understood those feelings well enough. He focused again, finding the Obelisk inside the tech, the echo was there... suddenly a bright light enveloped them and moments later they stood beside the Obelisk where their journey had started.

The other team pointed their weapons at them, shocked to see them. “Sirs?” Lt. Simm asked.

“It’s us. We need to get the hell out of here,” Cam said, authority in his voice. They nodded and they all hurried to the Gate, going home.

John sat alone in his now empty quarters at the mountain, looking around a last time. It was two weeks since the incident on the planet, two weeks since their return from the dreamworld. He had tried to not think of it, tried to go back to what had been before, but found he couldn’t. He couldn’t lie anymore, hide anymore. Part of him had been shown the one wish he had been denying for years, had actually gotten to live that wish for a short while. It was more than he could handle. Only three days later he had been informed that the former Atlantis expedition had been resolved for good, that a new international team would be replacing them. Inside those words he had all too clearly heard that he would not be on that new team. He was not surprised, how could he be? They had not wanted him on that expedition in the first place, he had been there thanks to Elizabeth. Now it was all gone. Somehow, somewhere the time in the dream had broken John’s will to fight for his place at the SGC, made him realise what it really was he wanted, and what he could not have. Rising from the empty bed, he shouldered his bag, looking around, making sure he left the quarters cleanly, before stepping outside and walking to the elevator.

Cam stood outside. “Where are you going?”

Surprised John looked up. “Topside?” he asked, which was the logical assumption. “Back to my place in Springs first, will take a few days to take care of that, after that... dunno.” He did his best to sound casual.

“Want some company?” Cam asked. He shifted nervously, flushing and wondering what he was supposed to do with this.

John quickly averted his eyes when he saw Cam’s blush. Why could his treacherous heart not stop fluttering like that, every time they met? “Why not? We can order some pizza, because I have only ‘weird’ food left in my place.” he replied and walked on towards the lift.

“Good. Let’s go,” he said, relieved. Cam didn’t... It just seemed like he was going to run and Cam didn’t want him to leave. “What sort of weird food?”

John shrugged, he had been home the weekend before and the remains of his cookings were still in the freezer. “A bit of pate de lapin and some Quiche Lorraine are left over,” he replied “And I made some potatoes with berries... meaning the potatoes are pink.”

“You can make potatoes with berries? I have to try this. Cook for me, Sheppard. I’ll return the favor,” he offered as they boarded the elevator to the top.

“You can cook?” John asked as if slightly doubtful. They left the evelator and approached the exit. He signed out, handing in his key-card. Everything else was already done. Then they proceeded to the parking lot. John’s car was parked in his usual spot he tossed in the bag. “We’ll make a stop at a shop to get everything, then.”

“I can cook. My Momma had me at her apron strings as soon as I could stand,” Cam told him with a grin. “I’ll ride with you. Sam picked me up this morning.”

John nodded he could always give Cam a lift back or call someone to pick him up. They drove down to town. The stop at the grocery store took a bit longer, because John needed to pick up a bunch of specific things. He tried to not think of other things. Not of what was so vivid in his mind now, that Cam was here with him. When he had everything needed they got back to the car and shortly after stopped at John’s place in Springs. Believing he might stay longer at the mountain John had actually found something nice for himself.

“Nice place...” Cam said softly, looking at the house. “I’m sorry though. About everything.”

Having set the bags on the kitchen table, John turned around. “It’s not your fault... if it is anyone’s fault, it’s mine.” he replied, flushing a bit. “I... I am sorry, Cam. For what happened.”

“John... What are you talking about?” Cam asked. “I meant... I was talking about Atlantis. Are you talking about what happened?”

John ducked his head. Loosing Atlantis hurt like hell, loosing what he had had in the dream for a short while was even worse. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have started with it.” He said quickly.

Cam looked at him, furrowing his brow. He looked around and kissed him on the lips. Cam looked him, meeting his eyes. “I am not sorry that it happened, John. Ok? I... If anything, I’m sorry that it ended.”

Startled John returned the kiss with gusto. It seemed too good to be true, too good to ever happen to him. “You don’t mind?” he asked softly, as they broke apart. “I...” He didn’t find the words and instead kissed Cam even more fiercely.

Cam returned the kiss then moaned, pulling back. “Sheppard. We can’t... I mean, we can, yes, but outside...” he told him, gesturing around them. “C’mon. Let’s get the groceries in and then we can continue this on your couch.”

John held Cam back, wrapping his arms around him. “This is why I quit,” he said honestly. “I couldn’t go back and pretend anymore. There was nothing left to... I couldn’t... I...” he stumbled over the words. He pushed them away, he was stupid to talk. Cam gave him this, he’d not squander it on talking. Together they walked over to the living room and dropped down on the monster-couch there. John leaned in to kiss Cam again, deeply and sensously.

“I- what?” Cam asked, surprised as he kissed him again. Cam settled down and kissed him deeply, his hands drifting up his sides. “John... What do you mean, you quit?” he asked when they finally broke for air.

“I meant, I quit. Quit the Air Force,” John explained, snuggling into Cam’s touch. “you caught me right on my last minutes at the base. I am a civilian now.” He had marked the reserve checker on the retirement paperwork, but Landry would rather eat glass nails than call him back to duty.

Cam’s jaw dropped. “But... John... I...” he didn’t know what to say, holding him close. “Are you sure?” he asked, rubbing his back, holding him.

John snuggled closer, gently kissing Cam on the lips. “It’s a done deal, I am out.” he whispered against his lips. If getting out got him Cam, got him Cam for more than just this one night, it was a good deal even. He wrapped both arms around Cam, his hands drifting up his back.

Cam looked at him, gently kissing his lips then his chin, kissing up his jaw. “Should we celebrate?”

John moaned, drawing Cam closer. “It’s a good reason to, don’t ya’ think?” he asked, his hands slipping up Cam’s sides.

Cam chuckled, kissing his forehead. “So... To bed? Or shall we put our groceries up?”

“Who cares about groceries?” John asked, grinning. It was so much like Cam to think of such details. He drew him up and led him upstairs to the bedroom. On the way upstairs he snatched kisses from him. “What do you like?” he asked in between two mid-stairways kisses.

Cam chuckles. “It’s your money...” he said, kissing him gently. “I like you... Do you like... being top or bottom?” he asked.

Someone should shake up his priorities, John thought. How could one think of groceries, when you had someone as hot as Cam...? They made it nearly to the bedroom door before kissing again. “I enjoy both,” John replied, snaking a hand under Cam’s shirt. “you?”

“I’ve only done top...” Cam admitted. “Is that... “ he asked, awkwardly, cupping his hips.

“That’s perfect,” John rubbed his hips against Cam, encouraging him. He untucked Cam’s shirt, quickly opening it, so his hands could slip under and explore the warm golden skin.

Cam looked relieved. “It’s been awhile...,” he warned him, his hands slipping up and taking off his shirt. “I’ve wanted this, wanted you since I saw you in the Sand box.”

“Then I’ll get all the chance to corrupt you now,” John chuckled, his lips tracing Cam’s neckline. “since the sandbox, hmmm?” He had wanted Cam much the same but instead of saying so, he let his actions speak for themselves, sucking the skin on his neck as they tumbled towards his bed.

Cam moaned out, tilting his head back. “The sandbox. I remember .. I remember seeing you in those choppers... I didn’t know what it was. But I knew I felt it for you...”

John gently licked the base of Cam’s neck, his lips trailing down further mapping out Cam’s shoulder. “I saw you there...” he whispered against Cam’s skin, gently rubbing his nipples with his fingers. “And I wanted you... I had a crush on you... but you were out of reach..:”

Cam ran his hands over John’s back. “We are really a pair...” he said with a light chuckle as he moaned.

This, each moment of this, was even better than what happened in their dream. John nudged down Cam on the bed, kissing down his chest, tracing the warm skin and the scars, as he continued to undress him.

Cam threaded his fingers through John’s messy hair. “Mmm. God.”

“Call me John,” John snarked at him, kissing his thigh. “No need to use titles...”

Cam chuckled and slapped his shoulder. “That was for blasphemy,” he said, teasing gently.

John grunted. “Says the one that’s taking the Lord’s name in vain.”

“John... Just... Let’s get on with this?” Cam complained.

“Sure,” John told him, starting to suck on his cock. Cam moaned out, so glad they were finally doing this, that they were finally getting somewhere. He had loved him for a long time... “Please? John...”

Playfully John let actually go, ghosting his breath over Cam’s very hard, leaking dick. “Yes?” he asked him nearly cheekily. Gods, he wanted Cam so much.

“Cheeky... I want you... I want you to suck me, I want to feel you...” Cam told him, brushing his thumb over his cheek.

John tilted his head to actually suck Cam’s thumb, pretending to bite it, before he returned his attentions to Cam’s needy dick. He snaked his tongue around it, licking him clean before sucking him down fully, using his tongue to further coax him.

Cam moaned out, threading his fingers through John’s hair. This was better than he imagined... better than anything he’d ever done before. “God, you’re so good... so good, John... Need you...”

Again John let go, the hard dick slipping from his lips with a slight plop. He languidly stretched beside Cam, his hand running up Cam’s chest. “Then take me,” he told him a whisper. “make me yours...” he wanted him so badly, and he want to feel Cam, his passion and his strength.

Cam looked at him and nodded, sliding the drawer of his sidetable open and pulling out condoms and lube. “I... It’s been awhile... for me,” he told him, the tips of his ears turning red.

John reached up to kiss him. “All the more reason to not waste time,” He cast a side glance at the rubbers. They both were screened for all kinds of crap at the SGC more often than other people got their hair cut, but if Cam preferred using them, okay.

Cam looked down to where he was staring. “You... You want me to go bareback?” he asked, putting some lube on his fingers and slipping one into John’s asshole.

“We’re far more likely to pass on an alien flu than common HIV,” John replied teasingly, wriggling against Cam’s hand.

“Good point... good point,” Cam said, putting the condom on the table as he slipped in another finger. “God, John... so tight...”

John pushed against his fingers, moaning softly. “Stop teasing,” His hands caressed Cam’s back, he couldn’t stop touching him. “Please... I want you...”

Cam nodded, spreading lube over his cock as he shifted John up a little so he could get to him. He gently teased his entrance and slid into his asshole, starting to thrust into him.

The hands of the dark haired man clawed into the blanket when he felt Cam claim him, he pushed down, bringing them together even more. A small moan escaped John’s lips. “Don’t... don’t stop...”

Cam looked down at him and nodded, thrusting in and out a little faster. “Not going to stop...” he promised, “I want you so bad...”

John’s smile grew all dazed, as his breathing quickened. He met each of Cam’s thrusts hungrily, wanting him, wanting it all. He body shivered, when he suddenly came, further squeezing Cam tight.

Cam moaned out. “Not going to last... Fuck...” he said, slamming inside him and coming with a yell.

John wrapped his legs around him, pushing them together fully, revelling in the moment. He cradled Cam as he came down from the orgasm. “You’re amazing, gorgeous and amazing,”

“I could say the same...” Cam told him, laying on top of him as he kissed every inch of skin he could find.

Ghosting his lips along Cam’s neckline, John found that one sensitive spot and gently began to suck the skin. He wanted to tell Cam how amazing and gorgeous he was but as he ran out of words he turned to showing it to him in other ways.

Cam moaned out slightly as John sucked on his neck, closing his eyes as he let the sensation wash over him. He pulled out slightly, pushing away and landing on his side. He tugged John back close. “Keep going. Please.”

John surely didn’t need to be told twice, he began slowly to expand the range, taking his time to explore Cam’s warm skin with kisses and sometimes even small bites.

Cam ran his hands over his body until he drifted off to sleep, his arm still lightly around John.

He woke up cuddled close to John and kissed him gently, trying to pull way without waking him. Cam went to the bathroom, taking a pee, washing his hands and face then looked around, finding a spare toothbrush. He looked into the mirror and started brushing his teeth. Cam went to the kitchen, slipping on a bathrobe and started cooking breakfast.

John blinked, feeling Cam move away. He drew the pillow closer, it still had Cam’s warmth and smell. He didn’t want to wake up, he didn’t want this night to be over. But he couldn’t pretend much longer. With a sigh he rose, going to bathroom to wash and change before coming downstairs too. “I see someone found the coffee stash,” he teased Cam, kissing his cheek.

Cam grinned. “I wanted to cook breakfast. Sorry... I probably should’ve asked... I used a spare toothbrust too...”

“That’s fine,” John chuckled. “the toothbrush will be sooo offended. But breakfast sounds great, like in really great.”

Cam looked at him amused. “You’re weird, John,” he told him with a grin. “But then, so am I...”

“Normal is heavily overrated,” John replied, for a moment wondering what now. He reached for Cam’s arm. “Where do we go from here?” he asked, as it seemed Cam wasn’t inclined to start talking.

“Well... I guess that’s up to you. I’d like to do this, be with you... but do you even want to stay here? You’re the one that retired, remember?”

John leaned against the kitchen counter. “Being retired means I can stay whereever I decide to be,” he said. “is this... me quitting... going to be a problem?” he was not sure what Cam was thinking of that.

“No... I mean... I wish you hadn’t, that you’d maybe talked to me or something... You gave up Atlantis... but at the same time, you weren’t given much of a choice either. Were you?”

“They’d never let me go back either way,” John shrugged. “but this wasn’t about Atlantis. The dream... it showed me something, it made me realise what it was that I really wanted, what I had been ignoring for too long and once I faced that... I was through with pretending. I... I guess I simply saw what the one thing was I really wanted and it became really easy to quit.”

Cam looked at him and pulled him into a hug. “I wish things could’ve been different. That you could’ve had Atlantis. I know what she means to you... But I wouldn’t change this.”

John wrapped his arms around Cam, leaning closely into his hug. “Atlantis couldn’t give me the one thing I wished for and thought I could never have,” he said softly, kissing Cam’s cheek. “You.”

Cam looked at him with a grin. “I never thought I’d ever hear that from you, John...” he admitted, deliriously happy.

Blushing John ducked his head. “I never thought you’d be interested.” he simply hugged Cam again. “and then the dream happened..:” He could feel his ears burning, remembering the dream.

“Then the dream happened. One thing for it... we got together,” Cam told him with a grin.

John tilted his head up, a smile in his eyes. “Yes, we got together,” he replied. “everything else will work out. We’ll just need to keep it away from Landry’s nose.”

“I think we can handle that... besides, he isn’t so bad,” Cam told him with a grin.

“He is a stubborn old cantankerous asshole who loves shouting at people,” John grinned back at Cam. “and he is a stubborn old moron to boot.” Half of it was teasing Cam the other half was the gleeful realisation that he actually could diss the head of the SGC as much as he liked now.

Cam chuckled. “You’re loving this, aren’t you?” he asked.

“Being free to say what I think? You bet.” The Freedom to speak your mind freely... The quote form his past brought John back to something from the dream. “Cam... inside the dream you asked me why I did not stay with ‘Prince’ Julian...” Cam had asked it first, so it had come from his mind. “how... how did that name come to you?”

“I don’t know... Is that someone from your past?” Cam asked. “I just knew that you loved him... I think when they had us together, our memories sorta mixed.”

For a moment John felt stupid, really stupid. Why had he not kept his mouth shut. “Yes, it’s someone from my past and... gods... I suddenly wondered if you’d ever met Julien. Or how you know... sorry... I am being stupid.”

“John... I’m not going to be jealous of some ex. That would be a little silly, don’tcha think? You wanna tell me about him?”

“I still feel silly,” John shook his head. “Julien and me... that was a long time ago, before the Air Force, in fact. There was a time... there was a time I thought it would be forever and ever but eventually our ways parted, the fox and the raven had to hunt on their own. We stayed friends, though. Not just like saying it, we’ve been friends ever since.”

“Sounds like his loss and my gain,” Cam told him with a grin. “Maybe you should go see him. Since you have all this free time now,” he suggested.

“His last letter said he was currently stationed on the Richelieu somewhere in the South Pacific,” John said with a grin. “so I doubt a quick visit will be in order.” He ruffled Cam’s hair. “Don’t worry, I will keep busy.”

“Ok, ok...” Cam told John with a grin, kissing him. “So... is this... are we dating, shacking up, what?”

Suddenly John looked a bit shy. “Is this what you want it to be?” he asked back. “I mean... it can be either... but... what do you want?”

“I don’t want this to be a one night stand, John. How about we start slow... date, hang out, have sex then see where it goes?”

“I don’t want a one night either,” John knew he wanted more than that, a lot more. He smiled at the suggestion. “I like the idea, we can go out when you are on Earth, I get to kick your ass on Call of Duty and we can enjoy our time together.” It was a good idea, a very good one.

“In your dreams maybe,” Cam told him with a grin. “You won’t kick my ass, John. But other than that, sounds like a plan,” he said, leaning in to kiss him as he served up some eggs and bacon.

They settled down together to eat. “I might move a bit,” John said after a while. “the SGC would wonder if I kept this place. But I can move a few miles away from here, to make it less suspicious.”

Cam frowned. “Why would they wonder about this place, John?”

“In theory I have no reason to stay here, and if I do so, they will wonder why, I guess.” John shrugged. “or I can be simply brazen, stay here and let them stew.”

“Let them stew. I like this house,” Cam told him with a grin.

John laughed. “Landry stewed, bleurgh,” he made a face. “but you are right, it is a good place.” He agreed with Cam, they’d stay here and to hell with anyone trying to get in their way.

Cam reached over and grasped his hand, glad to have him in his life finally.

Fin


End file.
